it's strange how jaded i've become. to the extent that i'm thinking of doing things i've never done before. like moving to the states. or batting for the other side.

i seemingly throw no caution to the wind anymore, and thinking twice before doing? nah, thats probably not gonna happen anytime soon.
fucking tiring to just cry and cry. drained like shit.
and to top it all off, Sat's incident at night was like the icing on the cake.

it is also very interesting how i have recently maintained contact with a friend who happened to be straightforward previously.


i thought that you were different. honestly, i thought so with all my heart.
good to know where i stand. that would bring me back to reality instead of being immersed in sugar-coated dreams. things that i thought i was sane enough not to do, i did. things that i thought were gravely illogical and ridiculous, i did.

i might just go on to be a trainwreck.



you broke me.